Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
she peed on how many people?
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
