Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
