She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize