i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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