No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
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