You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Randomize
