he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
