my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
