we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
