I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
