I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
