Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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