no, he came in my armpit
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize