trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm like, not good at living.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
we're so committed to being not committed
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
