Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
