Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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