But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
