last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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