Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
