And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
he was CRYING into my vagina
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
