We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize
