I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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