we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
