Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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