it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
