I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
