Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize