Its about making memories worth repressing
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Randomize
