My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize