Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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