my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize