we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize