You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
