I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
