in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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