I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
her facebook's as public as her vagina
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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