Pappa wants mamma naked
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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