what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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