talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
