Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
