If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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