I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
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