420 ftw
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
