I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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