I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
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