A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
