i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
