my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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