YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
