Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
