apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
