She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
