A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
should my penis look like a turkey
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize